Dear Abby: I am a grandmother of three and was particularly close with one of the girls. When she was younger, she’d come to visit for months at a time. (We live in different states.) She seemed to change when she was in college. Because I wasn’t hearing from her, I asked her mom how she was doing. When she heard about my inquiry, my granddaughter got very nasty. She said that I should ask her if I want to know anything about her and to keep her mother out of it. When I explained that I only asked her mom because I don’t hear from her, she blocked me from her social media and no longer returns my messages or phone calls. I miss her and the relationship we had very much. Should I let it go or keep trying?
— Heartbroken in the South
Dear Heartbroken,
Your granddaughter may not have wanted her mother nagging her about not having enough contact with you, or she wasn’t comfortable having her mother act as go-between. She also may feel entitled to a private life. Ordinarily, I would suggest that you write or call her and apologize. However, since she has blocked those means of communication, try putting your thoughts into a letter (with a stamp on it) if you have her street address. If that fails, you may have to wait to communicate with your granddaughter until she grows up enough to recognize that she overreacted.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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