HGTV star Brandon Hatmaker is sharing his side of the story after his ex-wife, Jen Hatmaker, detailed his affair in her new memoir, “Awake.”
Brandon and Jen, who cohosted HGTV’s “Your Big Family Renovation” from 2014-2015, had been married for 26 years when Jen discovered he was cheating on her in 2020.
Jen told the New York Post that her husband’s infidelity was “so outside the realm of what I would have ever considered a possibility” that she “almost could not process it.” But Brandon had been unhappy for a long time when he begun the affair that ended his marriage.
In a lengthy essay posted to Substack on Monday, Sept. 22, Brandon said his affair was “the culmination of a three-year personal spiral in which I had lost my anchor, felt no hope, and was the loneliest I’ve ever been in my life.”
While Brandon emphasized that “there are no excuses” for his behavior, he wanted to “add context” for people who know only a piece of the story.
“I went to counseling (alone) for three years prior to my affair, I felt invisible in my marriage, and I kept spiraling until there was no lower place to go. Jen and I eventually went to a handful of therapy sessions together — but to be honest — it was too late,” he wrote. “To have an affair was extremely new to me and not who I truly am. I had completely lost myself. My anger had turned to resentment, which turned to entitlement. There’s no affair story that isn’t gross, or secret, or deceptive. Mine was no different. I was in the middle of giving up and trying not to. And then I did.”
Brandon noted that the fallout from the affair was “the lowest moment” of his life.
“I caused so much pain and I brought so much humiliation into the lives of people that I loved,” he wrote.
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Brandon went on to clear up several misconceptions about his and Jen’s divorce, including the perception that he was a “deadbeat dad.” He and Jen share five children, two of whom were adopted from Ethiopia.
“To be clear, at the time of our divorce we had three adult kids and two teenagers. I know that I forever changed their story, but I was always available, was constantly engaged, and always supported them … and still do,” Brandon wrote.
Brandon also clarified that his second wife, Tina, whom he married in 2023, is not the woman he had an affair with.
“In no way was Tina involved or a part of my divorce in 2020,” he wrote. “Tina and I had never met until after the divorce was filed.”
Brandon credits Tina with saving his life.
“It was nice to be around someone who said, ‘Listen, I’m the last one who should judge you’ followed by ‘and who is Jen Hatmaker? Never heard of her,’” he wrote of Tina.
As for Brandon’s reaction to Jen’s new memoir, he thinks his ex-wife has “every right to share her piece of the story” and he doesn’t “blame her” for doing so.
Jen’s memoir “Awake” hit shelves on Tuesday, Sept. 23.
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