Dear Eric: We live in big city where houses are very close together. My neighbors keep their trash bins in the driveway close to my front and side doors. They have three dogs, and the bin banging begins early, sometimes before seven in the morning.
My living room and kitchen are right next to their driveway, so I hear banging from trash lids all day long from throwing dog waste and more.
When I worked, I probably didn’t notice as much but I’m retired now, and it is really getting on my nerves. I want to ask them to please try and close the bin quietly instead of just letting the lids drop and bang, but my husband thinks they will retaliate and make it worse.
We mostly have a good relationship with them, but I do not want to have this banging the rest of my life. Ideally, they should put their bins in the alley, but I would settle for quiet shutting as I guess it is convenient for them to keep close to my door. Your thoughts?
– Quiet Please
Dear Quiet: If you have a mostly peaceable relationship with your neighbors, it doesn’t seem likely that a request like this would escalate to retaliation. It’s a reasonable ask and your solutions — either moving the bins or being more conscientious about shutting them — are seemingly easy to implement.
Whether in a big city with its close proximities, or a remote piece of land where the nearest house is barely in view, or somewhere in between, we have to figure out how to live in harmony with those around us. As with any other relationship, one of the foundations of good neighbor-hood is communication. And that runs both ways. When you let them know what you’re experiencing, you empower them to make a change. So, don’t be afraid to speak up.
Now, it’s also true that some people are, well, jerks. And if that’s the case and they set about making more noise, rather than less, then you’ve got a different issue. But I’m hoping conscientiousness wins out for your sake.
Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at [email protected] or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.