Dear Annie: Lately, I’ve noticed a strange habit of mine, and I can’t quite figure out why I do it.
Some nights, when I can’t sleep, I grab my phone and scroll through Google News or random articles to help me drift off again. It’s nothing secretive — just harmless late-night reading. But the moment my husband moves, rolls over or stirs even slightly, I instinctively hide my phone, as if I’m doing something wrong.
The funny thing is, I know he wouldn’t care. He’s never given me a reason to feel like I have to sneak around or be secretive. And yet, I still react like a guilty teenager caught past curfew. It makes no sense to me! I know I’m not doing anything wrong, so why do I feel like I need to hide it?
Could this be some kind of subconscious guilt, even though I logically have nothing to feel guilty about? Is this just an old habit from the past creeping into my marriage? I’d love to understand what’s going on in my own head because, quite honestly, it drives me crazy that I do this. — Feeling Guilty
Dear Guilty: You don’t have anything to feel guilty about. Your reaction is likely a conditioned habit, not guilt. Somewhere along the line — whether in childhood, a past relationship or just a desire to be considerate — you learned to associate being “caught” on your phone with doing something wrong. Even though you know your husband wouldn’t care, your brain reacts on autopilot.
That said, scrolling your phone in the middle of the night isn’t doing your sleep any favors. The blue light from your screen can interfere with melatonin production, making it harder to fall back asleep and lowering sleep quality overall. If you’re struggling with restlessness, try a non-screen alternative — like reading a book or listening to calming audio.
The next time you catch yourself hiding your phone, pause and remind yourself: I’m not doing anything wrong. With time, that awareness will help you break the habit.
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