Young matinee audience in Boston leaves Taylor Tomlinson horrified

“After Midnight” host Taylor Tomlinson had a notably young crowd at a recent stand-up comedy performance in Boston.

The 31-year-old comedian was performing at the Wang Theatre as part of her Save Me Tour last week when she was shocked to learn that some of her audience members were kids. 

Tomlinson shared video of the exchange on Facebook, writing in the caption, “Apparently my matinee show in Boston was a middle school field trip.”

“You don’t know Noah’s Ark? Oh my god, are you serious? You’re 12? Oh f–k,” Tomlinson said to an audience member, followed by laughter from the crowd. “You’re 12? What are you doing here? You should not see my sh-t before Noah’s Ark.”

“Oh no,” she said. “Are you here with a parent? This is your mom? Oh my god you’re the coolest mom alive. … I’ve only had like a few 12-year-olds ever see me live and I … every time I’m like I gotta go back to church. Gotta clean it up, this isn’t good.”

Then, a voice from the crowd yelled, “I’m 11!”

“You’re 11? F–k!” said Tomlinson. “If there’s a 10-year-old here I’m walking off. Eleven? You should not be here, you should be at home waiting for your Hogwarts letter. What the f–k,” said Tomlinson. 

Another person yelled out, “I’m 13!” to which Tomlinson replied, “Thirteen’s fine, you should know how the world works.”

“I’m not doing any more afternoon shows. I didn’t know y’all were going to treat it like a daycare. I didn’t know … I thought this was like a fun, sexy brunch crowd. I didn’t know we were coming here instead of the park,” she quipped.

The six-show Boston leg of Tomlinson’s tour ran from Feb. 27 through March 2. Tour dates in the U.S., Europe, and Canada run through December.